what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
