you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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