Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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