This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
And then he peed in my hair
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