I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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