can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize