I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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