What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
