i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
