Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
