Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
