theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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