big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
