Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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