I'm jealous of your bromance
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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