So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
