it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
