I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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