I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
