At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
