Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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