no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
