Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
