Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
