Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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