Texts From Last Night

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  (219): View more from Indiana

  The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes

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  (219): The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes http://tfl.nu/ulxb
  Replies (14) Good night (939) Bad night (4504)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.

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  (678): he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with. http://tfl.nu/6t6o
  Replies (17) Good night (4647) Bad night (951)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.

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  (630): it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up. http://tfl.nu/l5tu
  Replies (10) Good night (5628) Bad night (776)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...

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  (773): omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this... http://tfl.nu/ilg0
  Replies (42) Good night (1104) Bad night (6556)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"

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  (603): your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers" http://tfl.nu/lsqw
  Replies (16) Good night (4235) Bad night (907)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.

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  (410): new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle. http://tfl.nu/lcrv
  Replies (30) Good night (8389) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.

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  (906): Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already. http://tfl.nu/ar92
  Replies (12) Good night (3798) Bad night (1828)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her

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  (518): She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her http://tfl.nu/ofex
  Replies (65) Good night (14060) Bad night (2937)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.

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  (920): I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice. http://tfl.nu/yj17
  Replies (3) Good night (1074) Bad night (2062)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.

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  (517): Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned. http://tfl.nu/fz01
  Replies (5) Good night (1843) Bad night (863)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.

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  (715): Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day. http://tfl.nu/c6jk
  Replies (11) Good night (2139) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.

  (1-614): View more from Ohio

  15 is 15

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  (614): He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community. (1-614): 15 is 15 http://tfl.nu/ct2y
  Replies (6) Good night (504) Bad night (967)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear

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  (617): He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear http://tfl.nu/svv0
  Replies (3) Good night (565) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK

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  (703): OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK http://tfl.nu/irl1
  Replies (8) Good night (1017) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants

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  (404): yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants http://tfl.nu/r49e
  Replies (3) Good night (529) Bad night (249)

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