He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
