hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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