My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Randomize
