Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
