ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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