ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
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