You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
