either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Randomize
