Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
