If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize