Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
