No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Randomize
