After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
