the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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