fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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