Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
