no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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