Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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