just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
