i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
