he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
