Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
