Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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