you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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