i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
