super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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